Sometimes it is so hard to forgive those who have hurt us. It seems we have some innate desire for genuine remorse or at least revenge. But we don’t always get either and the reality is even without it we have to move on. The problem with unforgiveness (that may not be a word) which makes forgiving absolutely necessary is that it poisons us. It poisons our thoughts our emotions and even our relationships with others. It can truly be a life long curse. I am purposely writing about this because forgiving is something I have had to and continue to work on, it’s actually a process.
I’ve met older people and even people my age that still talk of pains from years and years ago with the same pain as when the situation first happened. To live life this way is harmful.
So how do we forgive?
Acknowledging the pain and hurt that was caused is necessary. You are stronger for admitting you are hurt rather than pretending to be strong. That applies to you too men.
Choosing to forgive is a mental choice that has to be made over and over.
Understanding the point of view of those who hurts us also helps to put things in perspective. Sometimes people make mistakes whether knowingly or unknowingly and that’s just the way life is. They too are suffering from some form of hurt.
Realizing that forgiveness helps you not them. Getting to a place of being healed and free from the hurt is liberating and also gives you the ability and tools necessary to help others to experience the same freedom.
So I choose to forgive.